Jimmy Kempski: “National Scouting Director”

Jimmy Kempski: "National Scouting Director"

Jimmy Kempski.  Also known as:  Slippin’ Jimmy, Coach K, Coach Kempski, Coach, National College Scouting Director Kempski, Mike Mayock Jr. and Fanboy.  This is a hard one because we have so many nicknames for Jimmy.  Jimmy wears all of these hats, but as we sit here today on the cusp of the NFL Combine, National College Scouting Director Kempski seems to fit the bill.  For the sake of time and ease of reading, we’ll refer to him as simply Director Kempski.

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Every day leading up to the NFL draft, its Christmas morning for the Director.  The season is won in the offseason.  This is his Super Bowl.  The hard-on he gets putting together 25 versions of his mock drafts, moving players up and down his big board, analyzing contracts and even critiquing national mock drafts, is a boner only a National College Scouting Director could get.  And yes, he is now critiquing mock drafts.  Though guys like Daniel Jeremiah and Todd McShay have played the game, established reputable inside sources and watch college football for a living, their knowledge is inferior to that of The Director’s.  But that’s par for the course with Kempski.  As a blogger for PhillyVoice.com, there are no days off breaking down film or adjusting the Big Board.

As we sift through the vast amount of shit Director Kempski throws against the wall, only a few things actually stick:

1.  I’d rather go to JD McGillicuddy’s in Manayunk with Sean Brace than read Director Kempski’s shit.

2.  That’s really saying something because we all know how brutally bad Sean Brace is.  “Bro, Manayunk, dude.”  Ugh, I already have the douche chills just thinking about that.

3.  I would never go to JD MdGillicuddy’s with Sean Brace

We’ll have plenty more updates on National College Scouting Director Kempski on the days leading up to his Super Bowl:  Draft Day!

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